Burnout

I just feel so exhausted with everything right now. The pandemic, quarantine restrictions, the societal problems, worries about the future, my disgust for certain actions and behavior, the soul-sucking hot weather, everything. I feel so defeated right now. I feel so hopeless. The past 2 months are nothing but a series of tests, a test of character, a test of faith, a test of one's self worth. It's been really tough. This week probably was the worst, triggered by what's happening with the country, those people in power, the divisiveness, the apathy, the selfishness, the willingness to be submissive, the general lack of kindness, the entitlement, the shrewdness, the pure nasty behavior I've been witnessing. I'm living in a moment of history that will be discussed for years and I hope to God this will have a good conclusion. But this is life and nothing ever really concludes so I guess what I'm saying is that years in the future when this is studied I hope we are at a better point in the society, better than what we are living right now.  I hope we are an evolved society by that time and I hope I will be there to witness it. If there's one thing I've learned this week is that when your hunch tells your something's gonna be wrong, follow it. If ever life will give me a chance to raise my own family, I will do my damn best to be a good model of a decent human. A person who has empathy for others' plight. A person that will not cause great suffering to a lot of people. A braver person.