Negative

 My uncle who is sick is thankfully negative of COVID19, my aunt informed my father earlier. My uncle's sickness is not really connected to it but as a precautionary measure by the doctor he had a swab test. Thank God! My uncle needs personal care right now so if he was positive of the illness it would have been hard for his family to take care of him as he will be isolated from them. My uncle's journey in battling his illness still has a long way to go but at least one scary possibility has been eliminated already. Praying hard he will beat this life challenge.

***

My other uncle who passed away will be cremated tomorrow. My father was able to gather more than enough funds for it. He got stressed earlier because his SSS pension was delayed since normally it would be released a day or two before the end of the month. We have been checking his ATM for the past 2 days and nothing! Earlier this morning, still no pension! I went to SSS Facebook page and found it was not just him but seems like all pensioners had delayed release. My father would have used the money to help his my uncle's family so he was really frustrated when it was still not released. Thankfully around 3PM the pension has finally been transferred to his bank account. My father was still quite moody earlier tonight but I figured it out it is because his brother will be cremated tomorrow and he won't be there physically to say goodbye so I understand the frustration. My dear uncle Jesus please guide Tatay, he loves you so much. 

A Reminder

 Earlier I noticed my favorite canteen near our office building has a FOR LEASE sign now. They have been closed since the lockdown but I was hoping they will eventually come back when the situation gets better. But months have passed and things didn't get any better. The total cases in the country is now over 300K and there's still quarantine with no foreseeable. A lot of offices in our vicinity are still working from home or worst have closed down. Sad to say the canteen can't really go back in business because there's limited customers anyway. It's sad because that canteen had been present since I started working with the company for 11 years now. While I usually have packed lunches to save money but in the times I don't or I stayed overnight at the office, that's my go to place because of the home cooked meal feels it had and their place is so clean as well. We are entering the 4th  quarter of the year and I'm so close to giving up hoping that things will be better anytime soon. 

One Last Time

 My father was busy all day contacting relatives to inform them what happened to my uncle who passed away yesterday. He was also asking for financial assistance for the cremation and other needs of his family. The truth is my uncle didn't have a good reputation among our relatives with money matters. My father knows this but his love for his brother is strong enough to overcome any hesitation or shame to ask for financial help. I overheard him talking on the phone telling someone that despite all the problems my uncle had brought upon, I hope for one last time they could help him out. When he was able to gather over 20K today, I saw how his face beamed as we collected the money in the remittance areas and ATMs. I read a text message from my aunt thanking him profusely for all the help he did today. I haven't seen my father cry but I know deep inside he is grieving. He is dealing with this sadness by doing the best he can to help his brother one last time While my uncle gave him some problems too, my father never gave up and continued to support him until the end. 

Hard to Believe

 An uncle passed away today and another uncle is hospitalized with a life threatening illness. Both are the younger brothers of my father. My father is of course stressed and devastated with what's happening. Bakit sabay sabay? All we can do is support my father right now as he grieve while at the same worried with his other brother in critical condition. He is coping by contacting relatives to inform about the sad news and coordinating financial help. He sadly can't go my uncle who passed due to the pandemic. And he said to me, he is not sure he can handle his emotions and could cause his blood pressure to rise. Oh dear Lord please guide my father in this very difficult time. May my uncle rest in peace while my other uncle heal as soon as possible.

Tough times

Diffuse

 Earlier there was a tension at home because of the bad news we received yesterday. It was a result of the stress and sadness because of that news. I was the one who was in the middle to pacify the people involved. It was so stressful but hey I'm quite proud how I handled the situation because things did get better and the friction was resolved. By dinner time everything went back to normal. Emotions are just high because of yesterday's bad news. I guess that moment earlier was needed because there were pent-up emotions involved that needed to be let out. Tough road ahead but I know I need to be stronger than ever so I could be the rock they could lean on.

Numb

An hour ago I was informed of a very sad news. I won't go into details yet because honestly I'm still processing what I am feeling right now. It involves one of my greatest fears in life. While I already had a feeling this will happen but now that it is confirmed, I still feel shocked that it is happening. This year is just the worst. 

Stretch/Stress

 So I've been doing a lot of research about Plantar Fasciitis because of what I've experienced and I've really learned a lot and I must say YouTube has been quite helpful for me to understand about it. There's a lot of verified channels that discusses and shares tips on how to take care of it. I've been trying some of the stretches now and it has helped ease the pain. I was able to walk normally today although from time to time there are still pinches of pain but not that sharp anymore. One thing I've realized because of this ordeal is how poorly have I taken care of my feet. It will change now. 

***

I'm dealing with a new thing that's stressing me a little. To be honest, I really shouldn't but I don't know why my initial reaction with matters like this is skepticism. I always manage my expectations but maybe it's getting a little out of hand that I always set myself up for disappointment. I always think of the worst case scenario and the likelihood of failure is stronger. Some are just fear and lack of confidence I admit that but I feel that there are cases where I just don't see how it works out but I never tell it to the other people involved because I don't want to be that person who drags everyone down or be exposed as a coward. With this particular matter, I'm on the fence what's really bugging me about it. Oh well, no matter what I still gotta and work my best. 

Plantar Fasciitis

 So I found what this excruciating heel pain I've been experiencing is all about - Plantar Fasciitis! Sounds scary but thankfully it's not. It is when a tissue at the bottom of our feet gets irritated or inflamed that causes this sharp pain on my heel! It happens to athletes and well to fat people like me that the weight was just too much for my poor feet to handle so it gets strained. Also can happen when you wear a shoe that's too tight! Another check on my box. Anyway, to relieve the pain I've looked up measures to ease the pain and discovered a doctor's vlog on YouTube! The massage and stretching techniques she shared WORKED! Thank goodness because I had a hard time walking because of this heel pain!

 

Heel Pain

 Today was physically stressful because out of nowhere I had heel pain so walking was a struggle! I have no idea why I suddenly had this when I woke up. Could it be a bad sleeping position? In the morning, the pain was not that sharp but when I stepped off the van and walked to my office, dang! I felt a sharp pain when I tried to walk normally so yeah walking was quite a struggle. It was quite bothersome until I got home and my parents noticed I was walking weirdly. And my parents are such worrywarts that they thought I got hit by a car or something --- yes that negative on the first go! It was quite stressful but anyway explained to them it wasn't the case. My mother massaged my heel which gave me some relief. Right now,  the pain is not that sharp anymore and I could walk better now. Hopefully I'll be fully healed tomorrow.

72nd Emmys Reactions!

So the 72nd Emmys happened and my prediction flopped with only 11 correct ones! I must the awards show went smoothly as the production was competent and quite good given the circumstance. I liked that this still had the thrill of awards when most of the winners accepting their awards in real time even remotely. It was a clean 7/7 sweep for Schitt's Creek which kinda annoyed me because the final season of The Good Place went unrewarded! But I totally can't hate the show even if I'm not a fan (and haven't seen the latters seasons) because the show is a true underdog. As for Drama my favorite Succession but sad they lost in supporting acting because Matthew MacFayden and Sarah Snook are my favorite on those shows. I don't watch her show but Zendaya's win was a pleasure given her family's reaction, that was a sweet moment! My favorite bit though is Sesame Street's The Count showing up to show support for What We Do in the Shadows, clever! This tweet from nominee Ramy Youssef went viral because it showed that there was actually an Emmy intern outside his home in hazmat suit with Emmy in hand in case he wins and when he lost, the intern bid farewell and left! Bizarre but funny!

Anyway, I'm glad Emmys did deliver something not awkward to watch and as the Emmy host Jimmy Kimmel yeah giving awards in the entertainment world is of least importance especially in this world we live in right now but hey this brings in some form of fun and we need that right now.

My 72nd Primetime Emmy Awards Predictions

 The Primetime Emmy Awards happening tomorrow! It will air locally on FOX LIFE and I'm really glad unlike the Oscars, there's local coverage here! The awards night will be virtual given you know what so I'm curious how they will execute this one since they will do it mostly live and they have over 100 camera crews stationed to the nominee houses/hotels/wherever they are staying to capture their winning speech live. I'm more excited how they will pull it off than the actual awards! Anyway, since I'm back on blogging I might as well bring back the awards predictions I used to do here when I was an active blogger!

Here are my predictions!

OUTSTANDING DRAMA SERIES: 

Succession 

OUTSTANDING COMEDY SERIES: 

Schitt's Creek

OUTSTANDING LIMITED SERIES:

Watchmen

OUTSTANDING COMPETITION PROGRAM: 

RuPaul's Drag Race

OUTSTANDING VARIETY TALK SERIES:

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES: 

Eugene Levy, , Schitt's Creek

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES:

Catherine O'Hara, Schitt's Creek

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES: 

Steve Carell, The Morning Show

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES:

Jennifer Aniston, The Morning Show

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE

Hugh Jackman, Bad Education

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE

Regina King, Watchmen

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES

Mahershala Ali, Ramy 

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES

D'Arcy Carden, The Good Place

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES

Matthew MacFadyen, Succession 

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES

Sarah Snook, Succession 

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE

Jim Parsons, Hollywood

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE

Jean Smart, Watchmen

OUTSTANDING DIRECTING FOR A COMEDY SERIES

Modern Family, Finale Part 2

OUTSTANDING DIRECTING FOR A DRAMA SERIES

Succession, This is Not For Tears

OUTSTANDING DIRECTING FOR A LIMITED SERIES, MOVIE OR DRAMATIC SPECIAL

 Watchmen, This Extraordinary Being

OUTSTANDING WRITING FOR A COMEDY SERIES

Happy Ending, Schitt's Creek

OUTSTANDING WRITING FOR A DRAMA SERIES

Succession, This is Not For Tears

OUTSTANDING WRITING FOR A LIMITED SERIES MOVIE OR DRAMATIC SPECIAL

Watchmen, This Extraordinary Being

Snippets 4

My uncle had his MRI today as he had been experiencing extreme body pain that almost made him immobilized. Praying hard for good result. My uncle is such a nice, generous, and hardworking guy and he does not deserve to have such physical suffering. I really hope he will feel better soon enough and this sickness will be cured. 

***

There's a major change in a work project I have that made me a little sad but I know this will be for the better to help the project's sustainability. It's not really a bad thing but just a major change that I need to get used to. I can adapt with changes but I can't stop my emotion sometimes. 

***

For the first time since we've been using a prepaid Wi-fi modem over a year ago, we had connectivity problems today that only one phone was able to have a good connection while my laptop and my nephew's desktop struggled to connect and when we did, the connection was slow except for YouTube! It was so odd but we turned off the modem for nearly an hour, when we turned it on again, the connection was good just like it used to. Anyway, good thing it was a not big problem because we're still gonna stick with a prepaid  Wifi, cheaper! 

Productive

 Today was one of the busiest day I had at work during this pandemic and I absolutely loved it. I arrived at the office a little past 6 AM and was busy all the way until 3;30 PM! I juggled multiple tasks which were doing quality check for dubbing, video editing revisions, submission of videos to our uplink facility. supervising the task for my work from home video editor and some paperwork! I even found some time to ran some errands for my parents during my break. I totally maximized my day. What I love about being preoccupied is that I didn't have the time for soul-sucking sentiments which I have been dwelling on lately!

Enveloped in Sadness

 Gloomy weather today. It didn't rain but some drizzles. It's the type of weather I actually like: Cool breeze without the stress of hard rains. It's the perfect weather to walk around and relax. And yet with everything going on, it just doesn't feel the same. In fact, the cold weather worries me because I could get the sniffles and THIS IS NOT THE TIME to have one. Six months in and even if I've experienced some liberties now, I still can't shake this feeling off. The gloomy weather even added intensity to what I'm feeling inside. I was listening to a local podcast earlier and one of the host said that the one of the permanent things in our lives is uncertainty and this pandemic placed it on centerstage. So true. 

Counting the Days

So we are now on our 6th month of quarantine and coincidentally this day also marks the start of the traditional Christmas countdown with 100 days to go. Frankly, it's so hard to muster the enthusiasm for the upcoming holidays with the uncertain state we are in right now.

Today we were issued a new version of the barangay quarantine pass with QR code now. This pass is not just for a single person per household but for three people now. I should be happy about it because it is less restrictive than the old one but the fact we still need a quarantine pass 6 months later is not something to be happy about. I'm still not comfortable in this so-called new normal. I can deal with it but I can't accept it. 

I saw a mall a few days ago which already has Christmas decorations like we have our normal lives back. It looks so sad because yeah the decorations are festive but so few people inside. It feels like they were trying to get that holiday magic but who can experience that anyway? Still hoping and praying for the country - the world - will be in better shape to celebrate the holidays.

Borders

 I discovered the Vox Media online documentary series BORDERS during the lockdown this year and I was mesmerized~ This is basically a travel documentary that focuses on under reported stories about international cultures and conflict. This was so educational and immersive. Excellent journalism! Unfortunately, the show's host Johnny Harris announced on his YouTube channel that the series has now been cancelled due to recent events. He was not direct about the reason but safe to say it's a financial fallout due to the pandemic. Journalism is really hit had by this crisis. So frustrating. 

Manic Monday No More

I usually work from home on Mondays but because of an important task I went to the office today and it was first my time to commute to work on a Monday in the pandemic world. The last and only time I went to the office on a Monday during this "era",  I was fetched by the office shuttle along with other co-workers residing in Cavite. Today the travel was so light and it's a strange feeling since it's a Monday. I don't know why but I can't still fully accept the "normal" we have right now. It's been 6 months and all signs are pointing that we will gonna stay this way for the rest of 2020. Why am I still in denial? Why am I still resistant? 

Go Away Negative Thoughts

 So our relative who is sick right now is worrying us a lot right now. I'm trying to calm my parents down by assuring them that everything will be fine and that he will be cured eventually but they are skeptical and seems to be losing hope. Our relative is bed ridden now, I don't know why he is not being rushed to the hospital but my guess is because of fear of COVID19 as well as the possibility that they could be turned away too because of the pandemic and beds could be full. Our relative is just in pain and has expressed he wants to have peace now, scary thoughts really. My parents are visibly worried and anxious. I'm afraid the stress will affect their health too. That's why I'm pushing for optimism because we can't lose hope.

 Oh dear Lord please save him and let him survive this ordeal.

Snippets 3

Water and Electricity bills came in today and paid them right away via Paymaya! We've been paying via those platforms since April and will definitely stick with it for the foreseeable future. My parents who used to be hesitant with paying without a paper receipt are now comfortable with this system 

***

A close relative is sick and not in physical good condition. It's quite worrying. I hope and prays he recovers soon enough. I couldn't stress enough how getting sick in the middle of a pandemic is just so complicated and adds more tension

***

My nephew had his first week of live Zoom classes and I asked him how was it and it was fine. The classes are from Monday to Wednesday and only in the morning. Just 30 minutes per subject. It's more really like a warm up, to test the new way of teaching. This academic year is just so hard because of how everything is so unprecedented. 

***

I don't have high hopes that things will be better in 2020 but I can at least hope it won't get worse anymore. Let us see the light please.

Normal But Not

Today the office shuttle was back so I went to work at the office instead of at home which I normally do on a Friday. I had an important work task that I need to do in the office anyway. To be honest, I could have gone home earlier via carpool because there's less traffic on SLEX which is the route to our town. In the office shuttle, I'm the last one to be dropped off as most of my co-workers riding the shuttle are from Imus and nearby areas so we go there first where traffic is just more headache inducing. But of course I can save money via the office shuttle so I wouldn't pass that opportunity. Traffic was indeed horrendous!  Before when I get stuck in traffic, it is because there's so much activity going on outside but not the case this time. We were still in the road by 6:30 PM and the malls are already closed or most of their establishments are. It's just a weird look to have a "normal traffic" but the surrounding's atmosphere is not the same busy and active life anymore. During the early days of lockdown, I once said to myself that I miss the normalcy of the traffic! I've experienced heavy road traffic again but definitely it's not a sign of things really going back to our pre-pandemic lives The torture of traffic just found a way to insert itself in this so-called new normal.