My life is always about a test of patience and how to control the situation from escalating to unnecessary drama and source of stress. It's so unbelievably hard because there are just so many intersecting factors I have to address. Most of the time I sacrifice my own happiness. I know I'm doing the right thing but whenever I faced troubling times I can't help but wonder if I followed the path I really wanted to take where would my life will be right now? I think this will forever haunt me. It's just the stress talking right now because ultimately I would have regretted it big time if I chose not to prioritize this matter in my life. It would have been more painful if I didn't make this choice. But I wish this line of thought will not cross my mind again. It's a real internal torture.
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