Monday, February 06, 2017

Breathe

For the second day in a row, I woke up suddenly gasping for air. It was scary. I felt suffocated. It lasted only a few seconds but it was scary. I will have  a medical check up later. I dread it so much. I know I need it but I fear that my already limited life will once again take a setback. And of course this reminded me how I hate that we don't have HMO in the company I work with. I'm afraid of getting sick because of that. I'm not protected. Still I'm afraid of leaving my job because I can honestly say that despite the lack of good benefits I love my job and I'm great at it. And it's a job that's a fit for my interest. But I hate that it isn't practical. I hate that I have regrets that I pursued a career that's not financially rewarding. I hate that I wish I took a different path. I feel so unlucky in life. Oh I know other people have it worst but right now I just feel so down. I can't catch a break.. I want to stop feeling this way. I really do. Oh Lord please guide me today. I hope my worst fears will not be realized, So worried. So stressed. So miserable.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Hey. How are you. It is so strange but I followed your blog years ago and I am just worried about you. The last time I tried to reach out, my message here just can't push through. Please know that somebody thinks of you and that please don't be sorry for the situation you are in.
Take care.

Unknown said...

Hey. How are you. It is so strange but I followed your blog years ago and I am just worried about you. The last time I tried to reach out, my message here just can't push through. Please know that somebody thinks of you and that please don't be sorry for the situation you are in.
Take care.

Unknown said...

Hey. How are you. It is so strange but I followed your blog years ago and I am just worried about you. The last time I tried to reach out, my message here just can't push through. Please know that somebody thinks of you and that please don't be sorry for the situation you are in.
Take care.

forg/jecoup said...

Hi!

Thanks for this, appreciate. I'm actually doing good. I just had some thick phlegm issues and I just took in antibiotics and all is fine :)